Rider

helen

I'm currently travelling, but I'm working on a new story in the "Gabby's" world, and I'm happy enough with chapter 1 to post it. This won't be a mammoth effort like "Mentor." It's four chapters, subdivided for length rather than content. There's no particular formula. I see it more as a "slice of life" romance.

Fair warning: chapter 1 is pretty much devoid of erotic content. Also, I'm adding a trigger warning for the death of a pet.

I've only posted one chapter. The rest needs some tweaking and proofing, but I don't plan to draw the series out long, not like "Mentor." It's complete, and the only reason for the delay is to clean it up.

fmerommel

So excited to read it! I'm super excited to see what Literotica's response is to Mentor. Also you should consider posting Cabin Fever there as well. That's one of your best M/F stories in the last few years. I love to reread this one a lot.

helen

fmerommel Yes, I'm looking forward to see how Mentor is received. Cabin Fever I'm not sure about, because it's definitely not part of the Helenverse.

helen

fmerommel On further thought, Cabin Fever is most definitely a no-go for Literotica. Logan has to be slightly underage.

fmerommel

I think I spotted a few minor typos in my initial first glance. Really loving the slow build of this so far 🙂

"Now that the topic was her bike, Nyss no longer has a sense that Hannah was less than competent.

"One short ride, and you've turned into a pillion princess?"

"Huh. We'll see," Hannah said. "But if you're going to make a habit of riding, you really need to get some riding great."

helen

I fixed #1 and #3. I think #1 was also a dangling participle, so I rewrote it. #2 isn't a typo though, unless I misspelled pillion everywhere. It really does seem to be a term only understood in context, though. I tried to find a definition and there isn't even one at urbandictionary. Most links seem to be to individuals claiming the title or guys looking for one, maybe ironically, maybe not. It isn't seen as negatively as "pillow princess," but I'm sure anyone more familiar with that term would see it as snarky. Nyss certainly does.

fmerommel

Yep I realized the further that I read that pillion was used a few more times. I also searched for its definition online and couldn’t find it but I figured out the basic meaning. Loving the story so far!

helen

fmerommel Ahh, just the word, not the expression? Yeah, pillion is the passenger position on a motorbike. "Pillion princess" is the girl on the back of a bike willing to let her partner do all of the work... closely related to "pillow princess," though it seems to be used ironically, humorously or self-referentially more than "pillow princess," which is usually negative.

We'll just have to wait to see if Nyss is a pillow princess too 🙂

helen

I had chapter 2 up for a few hours, but when I checked if again this morning i saw that if was missing some changes, so I need to find where the most recent version is and reupload. It should be back this evening.

helen

"Rider" is complete. I've read the final section through multiple times, but I found things to fix on each pass, so I'm certain there are a few left. Still, I hope you enjoy what's probably the conclusion to several stories, not just to Nyssa and Hannah.

fmerommel

I'll read through it and keep an eye out for typos! I couldn't remember if there were 3 or 4 chapters cause the ending of Chap 3 with Nyssa flying out totally felt like it could have ended the story

helen

fmerommel I think it could have ended after chapter 3, but I felt they really needed an epilogue to prove Nyss really does plan to return. Also because of wrapping up side stories. Faye and Erin deserve better than to fall out of the story as they did in Entanglement.

fmerommel

I totally forgot about that haha. Is that a story that you could edit before posting there or would it fundamentally change the characters?